Daily Log #9 (Public Perception)

After having a very rough night, probably one of the worst since the first week after surgery, I got up to do some research on the Internet to see if I could discover why I was feeling so bad. At one point last night my back was shooting an electrical force down my legs and at one point both legs lifted--involuntarily--about three inches off the bed and shuck violently for about three or four seconds. It was horrible! Scared the crap out of me that's for sure! I'm supposed to have control over my body and that really sucked.

While laying on the couch trying to sleep--I always go there so my wife can stay in bed and get a good nights sleep--I made the connection of my recent problems with my increased dosage of requip. There are a few things going on that led to the dosage increase. First of all, I take 20mg of Oxycontin 3x/day, but because I want to sleep better I thought I would try taking two Oxycontin tablets before bed instead of one and then I'd only take one tablet during the day. Sounded logical to me. The Oxycontin causes me to have some very slight muscle twitching that doesn't happen too often so I didn't think anything of taking the two tablets at night. I've been taking them that way for about two weeks and for some reason I never associated my twitching with the Oxycontin. Well, this last Tuesday night the pain and twitching in my legs was pretty bad and I thought it was because of my Restless Leg Syndrome so I took two 2mg tablets of requip instead of my normal one tablet. A little while later I started feeling okay and tried to go back to sleep.

Daily Log #8 (Disoriented)

This was a strange day. I have always been an anxious person who worries a lot about the future and I brood over the past. Both things that I should do a lot less of and I know it. The last few days, besides sleep problems, I've been more anxious than normal for no particular reason, I think. I've had panic attacks before and I know when they're coming on and I know how to calm myself before the attack can get off of the ground.

This time seems a little different because I'm not running the negative thoughts through my head. As a matter of fact, I've been feeling rather excited about writing the blog everyday along with my other writing. So when anxiety seems to be anxiety for the sake of anxiety, I have a little more trouble keeping it down.

Part of the problem stems from the medication, part of it stems from pain, and part of it stems from no sleep. Normally I would include negative thoughts in that bunch, but today it doesn't apply.

Daily Log #1 (Restless Leg and CP)

Well... I guess the best place to begin this is with how well I slept last night. Not good at all!! Before I go to bed at night I take 40mg of Oxycontin, 10/325mg Norco (Most people know it better as Vicodin), and 4mg of Requip. The Oxycontin and Norco are for pain relief so I can fall asleep and the Requip is for a condition called Restless Leg Syndrome or RLS. The RLS causes extreme fatigue in the legs and gives you the sensation like you need to keep your legs moving constantly or you'll go crazy from the discomfort. Some nights I'll take Ambien to help me sleep, but I only take that when I've already gone a few nights with little or no sleep.

Remember those lab experiments you did in high school where you connected a battery to a dead frog's legs and they'd start to twitch and jump? Combine RLS with Sciatic nerve problems and it's like someone zapping my back with current from a nuclear power plant. My legs jump uncontrollably with a feeling of electrical shock striking the center of my low back, just above the hip bone (Technically the L5-S1 joint), and then it streaks down the back of my legs causing them to spasm and shaking the whole bed. The Requip reduces the frequency of these attacks. Some nights, when a bad episode hits, I have to go sleep on the couch or I keep my wife awake all night. Last night, for the first time in a few nights, I was able to escape that ordeal.

Yesterday, I tried to help out around the house by putting some dirty cloths through the washer and dryer. Simple enough, right? Not for me. My whole life I've been warned not to be lazy. It was pounded into my head by my mother when I wouldn't clean my room. So I've worked my butt off since I was 10 years old and started working summers for my dad doing construction. Except for the time around the end of my first marriage and I started going to college, I've worked very hard. Now I have a hard time doing laundry. Here I am, this big man ex-marine and I can't help my wife carry groceries from the car to the kitchen. This is a source of major depression that I'll probably write about later. In any case, I get so frustrated not helping around the house that I go and do a lot more housework than my body can handle and I end up in severe pain for the next few days afterward--regardless of the pain medication.